Not so Christmas-sy...

Darn. My disk drive doesn't seem to be working. I wanted to save something I typed in a diskette, about gifts I got. Also, I prepared a wish list...They will have to wait, then.

Okay, I didn't really exert that much effort, but I did try to be merry this Christmas. But how can I do that when here and there, disaster strikes?...Please, pray for our Asian brothers and sisters. The recent tragedy is simply overwhelming. Please, include them in your prayers and your wishes...

Anyway, maybe I won't be able to log in again till next week so before I lose the chance to greet them, I still would like to greet each of my friends, Abby and Joey, a Happy Birthday :) Yes, let us try to still smile despite everything...

Well...

Typed something last night for posting here but decided not to. Too whine-y, now that I think about it. Anyway, at least I was able to log in today 'cause it's Sunday and since I was going to buy a copy of a national daily anyway, decided to come here for a while and read some stuff. Funny, but yesterday, I thought it was Friday until I saw the shows on TV and realized my mind was a day late!

Will probably post more one of these days. Until then, enjoy your holidays, kids! ;p

Okay, before I forget....

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!!!

I may not be able to log in for a while so don't be surprised if you don't feel my presence, he he....But I will log in one of these days (for sure, my inbox would be so full, but what the hey) and fill you in about my days and maybe add "junk stories/poems" to infiltrate your inboxes...and that's a threat!!!! ;p

*kisses and hugs*

~Li'l Dovey~

Before I go home...

I slept the whole morning today because I woke up not feeling good. My throat is all parched up for some reason. Then I bathed and then arranged the stuff I brought from our office (I resigned, remember?). Goodness. Can't believe I had all of those! Going home later.

Meanwhile, am here, going through e-mails. After, will go to mall to go to FedEx and send a gift to godson. Then I eat (haven't yet eaten breakfast nor lunch and I can feel the hunger now) and then head home carrying the loot (gifts, he he) I received. Haven't opened them.

"Partying" alone...

He he, not really. After the party, we left at 8 p.m.

I went to the mall to check out if they're showing Phantom of the Opera already. Cursed under my breath. No, it's not being shown, not today, not tomorrow, not in the very near future, it seems. Ugh! I hate that! So went to department store to buy gifts for my parents. A nice beaded bracelet for Mame and a cap for Dade. Took me an hour to find and choose.

Went to 711 after and bought a bottle of San Miguel Beer Light Pale Pilsen (whatever pale pilsen means, but hey, it's "low calorie"). OMG. I sound like I love to drink. I don't. I'm not even really a social drinker either. Probably will get drunk fast if I let it. But I'm just in this stupidly sad mood. Anyway, I'm here now renting a computer, checking out entries and typing down mine, listening to songs from Romeo et Julia - van Haat tot Liefde, all songs in Dutch, as if I understand. But I love the music. And I imagine myself as Veerle Casteleyn.

Will be going back to the boarding house in a few minutes.

Here partying...

Yep, I'm right here partying, meaning we ate lots, exchanged gifts, and are now doing videoke. Had to sing a Celine Dion song and was surprised I was able to "scream out" the parts very well. Drinking red wine a little bit. I don't really drink and I'm just sipping. The more daring part of me wants to get drunk. Of course, I won't. It's just it's my last day/afternoon at work and I really just want to make the most of it. I hope I don't cry later on when it's bye-bye time...

OMG. I think I'm a bit drunk already...

*scary*

Well, just bought gifts for my godchildren. Am now at a computer rentals shop...Just delaying the time that I'll tell my mother, "I resigned"...Going home after 15 minutes...


Hay, Advanced happy Birthday to Dennis and Jeffer!!!!!

Tests, tests...

Take the quiz: "Which Magical Dark Creature Are You?"

WereLeopard
You are a wereleopard. Very sensual and intense - dramatic even. You're fast, agile, graceful, strong, and you have kickass eyes. Very touch oriented - you need constant contact with other warm cozy people to be at peace. Playfull and furry no one will complain when you want a cuddle - or a little more. Okay or maybe even a lot more... Purrr for me baby.



Your element is Fire: Strong, hot tempered,
powerful, and passionate. Well now lets see,
being fire you are quite strong and powerful,
people look up to you greatly and often seek
your protection. You have the ability to gain
many friends and you are always one people can
count on to do what you say you will do. You
are extremely loyal be it friends or family
you'll stick up for them and you are never
willing to put them in a position that could
hurt them. You know what roll you play in life,
leader, and you intend to let people know it.
Not everyone is capable of leadership but you
certainly have the willpower and flare to do
it. You have quite a temper if it shows itself,
one that can often lead you into trouble. Once
your mind is made up there is no changing it
but no one said that was a bad thing.


.:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla


Well, aren't I consistent!

No Vacancy

Some Christmas this is turning out to be.

This has got to be one of the worse, if not the worst, Christmases ever in my entire adult life. So far. Just when I thought there would be no chance of Christmas becoming "bad" anymore.

Wrong.

These past days, my Miss Hyde has been popping here and there to distract me. And why not? It's almost 2005 and what have I really proved to myself? I have come to know myself more, yes, but that is hardly comforting or reassuring, to say the least. So far, all I've really felt these days sum it all up in one word - INADEQUATE. 'Cause that's what I feel, inadequate...

...as a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a relative, a neighbor, a godmother, a friend.

...as a writer, a poet, an artist, a professional.

...as an advocate, a member of society, a girl/woman/female.

...as a Filipino.

...as a human being.

Yes, I know, I'm allowed not to be perfect. But I don't want to use that excuse. Can't I just be adequate enough for once? That will probably suffice for the perfectionist in me. Just this once, please give me that. Why does our world always have to hang in a balance? Why can't it just stay on a platform where it's safer?

Yes, I also know that. If it does that, then the world will have to come to a stop. Then what? I'm just wishful thinking, I guess. I wish there is a way to let the world keep turning without any danger of falling...Like I said, wishful thinking.

Please, bring back my optimism, even just this Christmas. If I can't have that, then let me sulk for a change. Move over, happiness. There's just one emotion that my heart can accommodate today. No vacancy, sorry.

My world seems much too small these days. Small, and hanging on a balance.

A word from Shakespeare

"To bait fish withal It will feed nothing else, it will feed my revenge. He hath disgraced me, and hindered me half a million, laughed at my losses, mocked at my gains, scorned my nation, thwarted my bargains, cooled my friends, heated mine enemies. And what's his reason? 

I am a Jew. Hath not a Jew eyes? Hath not a Jew hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions? Fed with the same food, hurt with the same weapons, subject to the same diseases, healed by the same means, warmed and cooled by the same winter and summer as a Christian is? 

If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge? 

If we are like you in the rest, we will resemble you in that. If a Jew wrong a Christian, what is his humility? Revenge. If a Christian wrong a Jew, what should his sufferance be by Christian example? Why, revenge. The villainy you teach me I will execute, and it shall go hard but I will better the instruction."

- Shylock, from "The Merchant of Venice" by William Shakespeare.

No, I am not a Jew, and this is not really about being a Jew, or being a Christian or Muslim or any other religion. This is about equality. Go pass the actual words and read between the lines. You will see the message quite clearly - We are all humans.

But being humans, we tend to forget and we seek and destroy each other and the world. Sometimes, I think the world is better off without us.

Stop this world, I wanna get off.

I Dreamed a Dream

From The Mind Unleashed's "10 Things You Didn't Know About Lucid Dreaming"

 Really curious...

Do you ever have dreams like you're in the movies? Not like watching a movie you've seen, but like being in one, even if you only realize it when you awake. I have these all the time! Complete with stars I either know or have never seen (or I can't even see the faces). The stars don't even have to be people I like nor hate and I'm always surprised why they come up in my dreams at all. Sometimes I wake up and realize "Hey, that's an idea!" and I wish I could write them.

They have their own plots! I mean, it's been said that often, dreams have something to do with the dreamer's state at the moment (problematic, etcetera), but sometimes, the dreams really have nothing to do with me at all, hard as I try to interpret! It's like I write them in my dreams! I just wish the plots are much clearer and sensible, though, ha ha! Maybe I could actually create one script. I've heard that some music artists compose songs in their dreams, so...I'm just saying this because the other night, I had a funny li'l dream. It wasn't that clear at the start, rather weird, but it soon became more "plot-driven".

It was a fantasy-comedy thing, maybe in the tradition of Ella Enchanted. The protagonist was an Afro-American "actress" but I'm not sure if she even exists in the real world at all. Her brother in the dream, I now remember, was Chris Tucker with long hair, LOL!!!! Exasperated by him, she stormed off then missed seeing her soon-to-be love interest, another Afro-American who was rather on the heavy side and with long hair, too. Maybe I've seen him before. She missed seeing him aboard a tricycle (a vehicle in the Philippines, ha ha! Research on it on the Net) with a little girl, his sister, who seemed Filipino. 

Then the woman was in the house, our house, and opened what we call our old kitchen which looked like a storage room (it does look like it anyway). There were old stuff that magically moved and talked and said something like going somewhere where all the others who were like them were! And then there was a Caucasian man I couldn't even recognize because he was covered in dirt and dust together with the stuff in the "storage room". The woman got more exasperated by the man and the stuff and stormed off again...

Then I woke up and was disappointed I didn't get to see the whole thing! Ha ha ha!!!!! And it's funny that dream psychologists or analysts or whatever you call them say that dreams almost always are in black and white. But my dream was in full color!!!! Really funny!!! Most of my "movie" dreams are often in color, though this was the clearest I ever had.

Oh, man...Well, anyway, one can actually tell oneself s/he is dreaming, I just need practice. So I will practice and then plot the whole thing in my dream. I will certainly search data on dream manipulations...Cool, huh?