The thing is, most won't care if I tell them directly why. I mean, they don't even ask why. I even actually tell them why, but...
Do you know what it feels like to consider people as friends, and then the first time you ask for help, they act like they haven't seen your message and don't say a thing? Not just for days...weeks! It's not even just the positive answer I am waiting for. I am waiting for acknowledgment, for any answer, even if they say no.
I don't want to be a nitpicker, or maybe matampuhin (someone who feels bad towards others just because they say no). I will understand if they have problems of their own. But to be ignored? That seriously sends a silent message: you're not really considered a friend, even when they say you are and even tell you "Miss you."
Some even call you "BFF", but treat you like trash they don't want to look at. Suddenly, they don't tag you in their posts or LIKE any of yours, like you've got the plague. Then you realize, that forwarded message supposedly for "BFFs"? They were also probably sent to all on their contact lists. So you aren't really anything to them except an annoying contact who has the gall to bother them and ask for help.
I'm just thinking, what if their helping me would spell the difference between life and death? Truth is, it's kind of like that already, in a way. What if I died, would they say, "Oh, okay. So sorry for her", then they would go on with their lives not really feeling anything?
I'm just saying, you know, that is not how you treat friends. Or anyone, for that matter. Would a simple "I'm sorry, I can't help you" eat too much of your time?
It's ironic that people who aren't exactly your friends, whom you haven't been acquainted with that long, sometimes, they're the ones to ask if you're okay and offer time to listen to you and to pray for you. God bless them.
And thank you to those who don't give a care. At least, I know who you are. God bless you, too. I'm not mad. But yes, it hurts like you just killed me.
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